This blog is reflective of my and Steve’s (he asked me to add his name), thoughts, beliefs, attitudes and/or opinions. If you are offended by what you read here then please take your offense to YHVH and ask Him why you are offended — maybe in your “offense” He has healing and deliverance for you.

Several years ago, Steve and I attended the funeral of a co-worker’s husband. We were friends of the family and had always had delightful interactions with the husband; but his wife, evidently, as we were soon to discover, didn’t quite see her husband with that same perspective. I guess you could call what she did in her eulogy to her husband a cathartic moment for her. She wanted everyone at that service to know that the man she knew and had lived with for many years was, plainly stated, an inconsiderate, thoughtless, self-serving, jerk — and that with a capital J! Maybe friendly, helpful, always ready to lend and do whatever it took to make others happy, but that was not the man she knew and lived with at home. By the time she finished excoriating her husband’s memory, everyone in that service was squirming uncomfortably in their seats. Whispers were heard going back and forth across the auditorium, “Is she talking about the man we knew?” “How embarrassing for her,” to, “I am embarrassed for her!” “Oh my, this is awful!” And it was… It is only as time has distanced me from this very unfortunate incident that I have been able to put some perspective on this sad event.

As Steve and I have traveled all over America and Internationally these past 12 years I have seen with my eyes the tears of women and heard with my ears their sadness, regret, and hopelessness that accompanied those tears. I am grieved to the core of my being when I see a man treat his wife with such disregard as if she were only put on this earth to serve him and that at his pleasure. (There are even teachings and books going around supporting this idea!) And what grieves me even more is when women take his abuse and total lack of respect with head bowed “submission” to a so-called higher authority; as if their place is to be the doormat their husband wipes his feet upon.

These unholy, unrighteous dynamics can’t help but breed two conclusions: someone becomes a bully and someone becomes a controller; and the game of Predator and Possum continues! Neither one may look like they’re playing this “game” to the casual observer, and the couple may even “play” at loving each other in public, but homelife is filled with conflict and abuse.

Where are the gentle Protectors? (More on Predators, Possums and Gentle Protectors in up-coming posts, or go here for additional info.)

LADIES, you are the keeper of the Light in your home — the caretaker of the Eternal Flame, so to speak. If you let the Light grow dim or the Flame sputter and go near to out you are allowing for the entrance of darkness into your home. This happens when you lose your voice — your ability to speak Truth in LOVE. Remember, it is the devil that comes to steal, kill and destroy. Don’t let him steal your voice. Giving up your role as equal partner with your mate in the kingdom of YHVH will turn your mate into a bully. I strongly encourage you to set a better witness for your children.

MEN, your wife was created to be your equal; not above you as a dominatrix nor below you as your slave, but as your equal, your HELPMATE! Believe it or not you are fallible. That is why Yashua is the HEAD and we ALL are to look to Him, emulate Him. You want your wife to look to and submit to you with complete, unquestioning obedience? What a terrific burden to bear, the salvation of your wife and children. What execution stake did you hang on? Who made you their Savior? Why are you negating the competed work of redemption of our Adonai, Yashua haMashiach? MEN, wake up! You are following a god of your own creation! Our YHVH will NEVER join your side — He doesn’t take sides — We are to come over and join His side! Be transformed into His image!

All the anger, frustration, silent tears falling into the dishwater or soaking the pillow in the deep darkness of the night are because we, as women, intuitively know that we can’t serve you as Elohim, because there is only one Elohe, and it is to Him that we live and breathe and have our being. And out of that relationship flows love, pure, unconditional LOVE. MEN, you want your wife to love you; then YOU learn to love Yashua and accept His loving you, and from that place of intimacy will flow a love for your wife and children, your friends and neighbors that will far surpass anything you have ever known when you were trying to be her/their god.

The best marriage model is represented by a triangle — a three-way covenant agreement, in which the husband represents one side and the wife the other with the base of the triangle representing their distance apart and the apex at the top representing our Heavenly Abba. As the husband gets closer to Abba, he will come closer to his wife. The same is true of the wife. They each need to focus on becoming more Mashiach like. As they come closer to Mashiach, they will come closer to each other. If either one of them does not hold up their side, the whole triangle collapses! When Yashua said, “As you would that men (meaning all people) do unto you, do you even so to them”, He wasn’t just addressing one gender. He is our example of how to treat each other, period!

Take a moment to reflect on this question: As a covenanted member of your marriage would you treat Yashua the same way you treat your spouse?  Would you do anything differently and if so what?

Don’t put your spouse in the place of our friend; don’t make your spouse feel forced to set the record straight. And most importantly treat your spouse and family in such a way as to hear YHVH say: “Well done, good and faithful servant, enter into the joy of My kingdom!”

Gal 3:27-28, For as many of you as were baptized into Mashiach have put on Mashiach. There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is no male and female, for you are all one in Yashua haMashiach.

Eph 4:31-32, And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of Elohe, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice.

Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as YHVH in Mashiach forgave you.